Whether it begins at a single’s mixer, a blind date, or online, romance in the modern world is complicated. If the growing spate of intermarriage is any indication, this may be especially true in the Jewish community.
Growing up in Boston and now living in California, writer/actor/comic/director/educator and all-around mensch Steve Budd has a bi-coastal perspective on the ins and outs of love. In his new award-winning show, “What They Said About Love” (which will be performed as a fundraiser for the Helen G. Budd Memorial Scholarship on July 12 at 7:30 PM at The Regent Theatre in Arlington).
Budd acts out stories from his own life, which might include items like those listed on the rabbit vibrator tests, and those shared by fellow lovers in a touching and hilarious look at the modern heart.
With a BA in psychology and sociology from Wesleyan and a MA in creative writing from BU, Budd knows a lot about the human mind and how to share its stories. Even so, little could prepare him for the personal story that set him on the road to this special show.
“I had a bad breakup when I was 50,” he admits, noting how this particular parting led him to question his very ability to find his basherte“I was like…why can’t I do this? Other people do this. There must be something they know that I don’t know. So maybe I’ll start talking to married couples; maybe they know something.”
Over the course of scores of intimate conversations, Budd began to see that he was not so alone and that others still felt alone even with partners. He also learned many lessons along the way; lessons that he hopes to impart through his performance.
“In terms of choosing a spouse,” Budd recalls, “one guy said that the main question is, ‘Can this person be my best friend for life?’ Another interviewee suggested that when your partner irritates you, instead of blaming them, look at yourself and ask, ‘What is it about me that’s getting annoyed?’”
Among the many larger insights that inspired Budd’s show was the idea that the most important part of human relations is realizing and being okay with the fact that the other participant is human too.
“[Another] thing that kind of stood out,” Budd adds, “was how many people ended up with somebody who didn’t match their romantic image or ideal. They had a picture of a certain kind of person, and then they meet this person that doesn’t match that picture, and they had to get over that.”
As a middle child, Budd says that he had to “get over” a lack of attention at many points in his life and sees acting and performing as a way to get past all that. Having trained at The Marsh and with The Groundlings in L.A., Budd has also performed with the San Francisco Playhouse, New Conservatory Theatre Center, Wheelock Family Theater, and The English Theatre Company of Israel. When asked what got him into acting, he reminisces about a production of Arthur Miller’s “All My Sons” that he saw while on a semester abroad in London.
“I began taking classes in Boston a few years later,” he explains, “and soon after that I started auditioning and getting cast.”
After having made a mark on the theater scene and the Jewish community in Boston (where he was a fixture at Temple Beth Zion in Brookline), Budd decided to escape the Boston winters by moving to the Left Coast, where he became a board member at Chochmat Halevin Berkeley. And while he misses TBZ and events hosted by CJP, he says that the Bay Area Jewish Community and arts scene are just as vibrant. Even so, he is looking forward to returning.
“I love being back on my home turf,” Budd says, waxing poetic about the famous Boston accent and his beloved rugelachfrom Kupel’s. “I also love being able to perform…my show for people who haven’t seen it yet!”
“What They Said About Love” (a Theatre Bay Area Nominee for Outstanding Solo Production) will be performed July 12 at The Regent Theatre in Arlington. Tickets for the show are available at http://regenttheatre.com/details/what_they_said_about_love_one_man_show).
